Monday 3 November 2008




You lot are all a bunch of wank.
But sadly, sadly, I am developing a love affair with you all.

You make me laugh, you make me cry, you make me discuss playing the banjo to inappropriate videos. I'm on my 12th repeat viewing, I'll have you know.

We share a lot. Too much. Too frequently and for too long. But I love it. Maybe more than Lena Headey. It's doubtful, but it's a distinct possibility.

I blame the twisted and naked world of AfterEllen. Now that Team Bra has taken one hit too many, we must remain true to our dirty, perverted minds. They can take away our bra pics, but they can never take our FREEEEDOOOOM! (Cue glorified bagpipes)

I need to let you know something. I want a bagel. In case you're wondering, I always want one, even when I'm eating one. The gates of heaven would look very round and doey for me ^^ albeit a little bigger so I could fit through. With my too much T & A!

And whilst we're speaking of secrets, I'll let you in on one. I'M GUILTY. I'm responsible. I think you know what for, and I'm damn sorry. I never meant for any of this, and I certainly won't do it again. Soon anyway. Orgasms must come first.

If you'd like to know what I did today, I'll tell you. I slept. Until fucking 4pm. There was something about Lorraine Kelly that did it, and the LittleBlackDress diet. Snooze much. I slept through three alarms, the postieman, a phone call, and my mum opening the door when she got home from work. Now that's dedication, fo' sho.

This is a shout out to all my special ladies:

Strict, Kim, PA, Ikke, Purrito, to mention but a few. I love you all and want to marry you. Msn makes my life.

Okay, you can calm down now Strict, I've done it, it's a bit shite though.

Can I come back to the convo now?

2 comments:

strict machine said...

its not shite, i love it. huggles

Anonymous said...

Awwww, the purple haired Londoner that I love! You are a funny writer :)I love the mention of T & A's, hilarious!